With roughly 21 full school days left to complete before our joyful hearts depart from school for the summer, parents should start thinking about what their darling children (ages 18 and up) need in their care packages before finals.
After visiting one of these sites, I entered a previously unknown dimension of pre-packaged kindness. If your ma is too busy to make one for you herself, all she has to do is spend hours deciding which package best fits your needs. “Would he prefer the Passover or Get Well kit? No. Maybe I should get him the April Fool’s package. Ugh. I don’t know!”
For exam time, there’s a kit called the Exam Cram which claims to include “Tools, treats, and tips for the final crunch.” It consists of copious amounts of “caffeine, sugar, vitamin C, quick healthy snacks, cool stress relief toys, inspirational messages, plus some practical supplies.” In the picture, a slinky was shown. That toy alone is worth the $39.97 (plus tax). With any luck, a sticker saying, “You rock!” “You go girl!” or “Hey, smarty pants!” would be included as well. Maybe the inspirational messages would say heart-warming phrases like, “You can do it!” or, “You better do it.”
Instead of doing homework, a new form of procrastination is also available: cleaning. If you aren’t exactly a clean freak, your parents could send you a kit devoted to inspiring cleanliness. If you already are a clean freak, this array of cleaning goods would make you the happiest kid on the block. Since I already revert to cleaning as a form of escapism, I would enjoy this kit greatly.
At first glance, I was a little disturbed by the “Sealed with a Kiss” care package. With items such as a Passion Journal, a Love Duckie and hot chocolate titled “Cocoa Amore” I started getting a little uncomfortable. It was then that I read the fine print advising to send this package to boyfriends/girlfriends, husbands/wives and the like. Good, because I’d get a little nervous if someone’s parents were buying them books on “The Art of Kissing,” as is included in this passionate package.
The Wall Street Journal named Hip Kits as the best care package producer because of the overall quality and price, so spread the news to your elders if you desire kindness in a box.
Personally, I would find any of these boxes intriguing and sweet, but I prefer the sweet thoughtfulness my mother thinks of herself. My mom made those gingersnaps for me. She knows I suffer from sore throats almost daily. She knows I love nutrition shakes.
She also knows I don’t have finals right now, but she cares so much she brought these items to me anyway. That’s what I call a care package.
(Published March 31, 2011 for MSUM’s campus newspaper, The Advocate.)